I’d be lying if I told you that I didn’t think we’d already seen the last of Mayhem in a paper dress.
It’s been our stance from the very beginning that, “when it’s not fun, we’re done.” The paper outfits have been a Mayhem guided adventure, and Keith and I had many discussions when our story and images went viral about never forcing her into making (or wearing) paper dresses.
A couple months ago, Mayhem and I had (what I considered) a heartbreaking conversation. It went a little something like this:
Mayhem: Will people stop liking me if I stop wearing paper dresses?
Me: No way! And if people say they don’t like you anymore because of that, then they never really liked YOU to begin with.
Mayhem: I mean, I still like making paper dresses, but I’m not so into wearing them right now. I like making them for my mannequins and cardboard people and my Barbies. You know?
Me: If you never want to wear another paper dress again, you don’t have to. Got it? No questions, no pressure, no having anyone else make you feel like you have to. Ok?
Mayhem: I mean, I still might want to again some time, but right now, I’m just not into it. I like other stuff too, you know? Like making stuff out of cardboard. And making videos. And cooking. And sewing. You know?
Me: Your creativity amazes me every single day. I sure think it would be a shame if you didn’t use it for as many different things as you can. I think it’s awesome that you still like designing paper outfits, but there are SO many ways to use that imagination of yours and Dad and I love seeing you explore new ways of being creative too.
And with that conversation, I thought we’d seen the finale on Mayhem in paper dresses.
Until yesterday. When she asked me to help her put on this one: When I asked what made her want to wear a paper dress, she simply replied, “I’ve been seeing a lot of girls in prom dresses lately. And I thought I could make one for myself. I think this would be a good prom dress, don’t you?”
I nodded in agreement and taped her into her latest creation. Then I asked if I could take a few photographs. She agreed but added, “let’s do some the regular way, and then some different ones too.”
And so we did.
In case you’ve been wondering, the creativity hasn’t slowed down around here. In fact, it’s at an all time high. It’s just gone so far beyond paper outfits! We have cardboard creations that have overtaken our home, an entire bathtub full of mermaids, and “taped on shoes” are all the rage. Basically, there are messes being made at a staggering pace (which you may have seen on snapchat) and that’s just the way we like it.
Over the weekend, Mayhem announced that we’d be making a film (not a movie) and she was going to be the director. She planned out each scene, selected outfits for me to wear, and then added, “You need to know I’m going to be yelling ACTION and CUT.” And then she borrowed a tripod from Dad and set up her little camera and told us just what to do. In the end, she was SO proud to sit back and watch the little clips we made together. Next up, she says she wants me to show her how to put the videos on a computer and put them together … something I’m certain I was never dreaming of when I was six years old.
I really truly have no idea where all of this creativity and imagination will lead, but right now I’m content to hang back and learn from her. And encourage. And do my best to create an environment where she can continue to feel confident in trying out her ideas. I’m a firm believer that creative thinking/creative problem solving is a grossly underrated skill, and that virtually every career could benefit from a little out of the box thinking.
Later this week, we’ll be leading a “creativity workshop” at the Farmer School of Business at Miami University and we couldn’t be more excited to jump into some serious “maker-ing” while we’re there. It’s always fun to visit new places with Mayhem and try to experience it as she does … with complete awe and wonder. I know she’s going to have a blast hanging out with new people and offering up her creative insight.
As for today, I’m not exactly sure what will unfold, creatively speaking. I never really do. But I’m thankful for the opportunity to spend time with my favorite people and the wisdom to embrace the mess.
So, now have we seen the last of Mayhem in a paper dress? I have no idea. But one thing I do know for sure … I’ll do everything in my power to make sure she always knows her value as a person goes so far beyond paper dresses, to corners of her imagination that she hasn’t even discovered yet 🙂
Oh, and one last note – the wrist guard … it’s just a fashion statement. No injuries have been sustained. She just thinks it looks cool.
I know this conversation. The art I do with my daughter went viral (collaborating with a 4-year old) and while we still love collaborating, she’s moved on to making things with paper and as an artist myself, her creativity astounds me. I’d never push her to do something she didn’t like. She lives drawing with me, but we work together now, and have our own separate art as well. It’s good! But yes I’ve heard the “what if they don’t like me anymore?” And we had nearly the same talk. We both have amazing girls, it seems!
Mayhem, you amaze me with everything you create!! It may have started with your paper dresses, but who knows where it will end? You have more imagination in your little finger than I have in my entire adult body. Don’t ever lose that spark, and create what makes YOU happy! I have no doubt that you will go very far in life. And I look forward to seeing all the amazing ideas and creations that are to come! You are an AWESOME young lady!
Mayhem, may you always be creative and have fun while doing it. I will be showing my little girl your photos when she’s old enough (she’s still only a baby at the moment) and see if she wants to be as creative as you are!
This is a beautiful post. I remember the days before social media when I made my own duct tape and green Saran Wrap shoes, explored making pinhole cameras, and exploring writing skits and acting. At the foundation of it all was a knowledge I was loved as me and while my creations came from myself, they did not define me. Creative souls are sensitive ones. You are both so fortunate to have each other. Go Mayhem–explore the whys, what ifs, and hows all around!
It’s so wonderful to see her grow through all of her creations. She’s becoming a beautiful person inside and out. I will miss the paper dresses but anxious to see what she dreams up next. Continue to encourage her dreams. There’s more to come. Can’t wait for the next adventure.
What a fantastic job you are doing enabling and guiding your precious child with wisdom and love!
Sweet stuff. Thank you for sharing your family fun with the world. 🙂
Mayhem!! Like what other people have already said, I am always so excited to see the instagrams and the snapchats because YOU are an awesome little lady. Your snapstories are the only long ones I love watching all the way through. What I like most about you is your energy and spirit. So I also like watching you run around and play with Moxie outside or counting your steps (oh goodness this makes me sound creepy haha I’m not!!) as much as I like watching all your maker-ing. You will always have a friend here cheering you on no matter what you do.
Paper dresses or not, I love watching mayhem’s creativity! Keep having fun, mayhem!! Ya’ll keep up the excellent parenting.
I discovered this Ted Talk yesterday and it perfectly describes how I feel being someone who loves to do many different things and it is definitely perfect for Mayhem! You never had to pick just one thing!
https://www.ted.com/talks/emilie_wapnick_why_some_of_us_don_t_have_one_true_calling?language=en
well done mom and dad…….well done indeed.
My alma mater! She’ll love Farmer, Miami, and Oxford…it’s such a beautiful place! Make sure to eat at Bagel and Deli in Uptown.
Mayhem, you are such a shining light of fun and creativity! No way we could ever stop liking you.
It’s exciting to watch all the fun, new ideas you come up with. Thanks for always sharing your awesome adventures with us!
You have an amazing way with words. I always love seeing what is created next!!!
Dear mayhem,
You are simply adored by my teenage daughters and me. We love how you attack ideas, see the world and share your heart through your creativity. We are always on the lookout for your coolness shown through comments and imagination. Keep on creating….because it is so much of YOU… which is who we really, really like.
Wishing you joy,
A Midwest Mama : )
I will always love watching Mayhem, even if she stops making paper dresses entirely. Your child reminded me that it’s ok to do what you love and own it. I saw in her this fearlessness I’d never known and wanted to find it in myself. If a 4 year old can be that brave and still have that much joy why can’t I? And it’s been a piece of the puzzle that’s slowly bringing me back out of my shell.
So Sidney, Mayhem, or whatever name fits you today, YES I will still like you. Because while your dresses are beautiful; it’s your fearless, creative, passionate energy that keeps us coming back for more.
Beautiful words, beautiful soul! Nice work in tackling a difficult subject and conversation. Love to catch up with your family and see how creative sweet Mayhem is! Enjoy Miami (my alma mater) and the cute town of Oxford!
You’re a good mom.
You’re going to my alma mater! So jealous I’m not still around to come listen to her! Create on, girlfriend!
I met you all at the UC social media week event. I think it’s cool that you made the decision that once it wasn’t fun anymore you’d stop doing it. Mayhem is super savvy and has tons of creativity with a spark in her eyes. I can’t wait to see what brilliance she unleashes on the world next. Take it one day at a time and let it develop organically.
She’s amazing! I can’t wait to see what she creates in the future, whether it’s a paper dress or something else. Also, you are a fantastic mother, she is blessed to have you.
I have followed Mayhem’s Journey since almost the beginning, and I love seeing what she comes up with. She has such an imagination and so much creativity that it inspires me and I’m 32. Whether it’s cooking with Mayhem on Snapchat or tours of her cardboard homes, I love seeing what she comes up with next and I’m glad that you are helping her see how much worth she has. I’ve said since the beginning that she is one of my favorite people on the internet and she will continue to be my favorite people on the internet as long as she chooses to share that creativity with us.
Mayhem is amazing no matter what she does! I can’t wait to see where her creativity takes her. I love her paper dresses, but I am more impressed by how incredible creative and excited she is about trying new things. Thanks for sharing this post with us. You guys are amazing parents.
I thoroughly enjoy Mayhem’s paper dresses, but I have to admit that I mostly just enjoy living a little vicariously through your blog and getting to enjoy her spunk and creativity. As a stepmom to an awesome son who I’ve known since birth, but who doesn’t live with us full time, and as someone who didn’t get the opportunity to have kids of my own, I so enjoy watching Mayhem being her fun, creative self. She’s a cool kid and it’s obvious she’s well loved. Good job all of you 🙂
You three are just my favorites for myriad reasons. I also love how much I’ve learned from this “child” (who is anything but that) over these past 3+ years. Can’t wait to see all the fun new stuff she creates (and watch her on Shark Tank in, oh, a year or two…I’m sure she’ll have a grand plan for world domination outlined by then!).
Haha, love the note about the wrist guard! I was thinking….is she wearing her wrist guard BACKWARD? And then I saw your note – so glad there were no injuries 🙂 Also, I love how you are handling this! People are inspired by her because she dares to try things and take risks and be creative, because those are such valuable life skills and we all wish we had them – and those talents and skills will always be a part of her (and open doors for her!) no matter whether she shows them off with paper dresses on blogs or keeps them to herself with her cardboard cities and baking skills 🙂 I had a great grandmother who encouraged my creative side (I spent every weekend at her house sewing dresses and quilts for little teddy bears and painting pictures of whales and dolphins on everything I could find – seriously, like every rock or piece of cardboard ever – and baking miniature pies with the scraps of her large ones) and I think those skills have benefit me in a million different ways throughout my life/education/career since then, even as a 33-year-old lawyer 🙂 Also, I’m pretty sure her brave, outgoing, creative little self will never have any problems with people liking her 🙂