Change is inevitable, growth is optional.
I don’t remember exactly when or where I first encountered the phrase, but I do recall filing it away, somewhere in the back of my mind. And allowing it to be committed to my subconscious.
But last year, a six-month hiatus from much of social media forced me to reconnect with my creativity, again. In a new way.
By myself.
For the ten and a half years prior, my singular focus was Mayhem. But last year, I had to come to grips with the reality, that she’s needing me less and less. Or at least needing me in different ways.
She’s more independent.
Her interests are changing.
She likes being alone to fill a notebook with her thoughts, in the form of lyrics. And she enjoys opening her sketchbook and letting her colored pencils take over. She can spend hours alone on her swing, listening to music. She tells me it’s her favorite way to clear her mind and think for herself.
And while she was busy, embracing new interests, I was anxiously waiting for her to come back and “play” again.
She didn’t.
I really can’t pinpoint whether it was denial or fear that left me paralyzed for so long. Denial that she wasn’t coming back, or fear of having to find something to do by myself.
But eventually it caught up with me. And I had to find ways to engage my creativity on my own. It had been far too long.
I will forever be a work in progress. And I will forever be evolving.
Changing and growing.
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